Shamoononon drives like a farmer's posts - Polish uPOST

I am a giant asshole

I started a foster to adopt program a week ago. Told them i wanted to keep the dog. They wanted me to work with their trainer and finalize adopting him on Saturday and they took him off the website. I didn’t like the way the trainer wanted me to handle the dog. Then I got to thinking, along with her comments that this…

Totally thought my fart would be silent

IT WASN’T!!! Pretty embarrassed right now. Bunch of people in the cube next to me.

Lunch etiquette 

Why is it so hard for some fools to understand that you don’t microwave fuggin seafood at work? Especially when it’s like 5000 degrees out and humid. Inconsiderate scourge!  

I've lost my appetite.  

Nothing sounds good and I can’t afford to lose weight. Post something appetizing please! Edit:  Thanks, all.  The humor in reading these replies allowed me to eat a somewhat substantial lunch.  

Wearing my lunch!

Went to the cafeteria to pick up some of their Salisbury steak (pretty good for hamburger meat) and spilled the majority of the gravy down my sweater and pant leg on my way to my desk. Oh, another typical day for me! What’s for lunch??!!

I got super glue on my fingers and under

my finger nails. It’s horrible! I feel like I’m some cheesy scene in a movie. 5 hours to go...

Just spent 4.5 hours at stupid DMV

California DMV is impossible. It takes 2 months to get an appointment, if you don’t have one you’re waiting for 4-6 hours. WHAT THE REALLY FUCK? Anywho, kid got her drivers permit, now I’m downing coffee just trying to stay awake. COFFEE!!!

Too much of a good thing.

I’ve managed to eat way too many cookies. Feeling pretty ill now. That might be the end to that.

I just got a new Playstation Pro 1 tb delivered

I bought it for myself after I hit a mile stone birthday. I got it nearly half off because I’m old and know other engineers who work at Sony. Tonight I’m battling my teenager who also has one (they don’t know they’ll be battling me, it’s a surprise). On my way to work I stopped to take over a Poke gym. Somebody kept…

California Insurance rate hikes

So my insurance for two cars (including a brand new vehicle and a 98 vehicle) at full coverage (maxed out) doubled. It’s almost another 100 a month. I had a ticket last year around February but hadn’t had a ticket previous for 20 years. I’ve gone around and questioned others about the rate hike and even people without…

Oh Cookie!  

How I love thee! Even at work, you make me so happy.

SMH.... smells like somebody microwaved an entire 

Octopus. I’m willing to bet I know who it is and it is Octopus. Don’t people know this is taboo at work? My lord. Time to up my game and add a fifth box of baking soda to my cubicle.

I got a salad today

So I could also buy a giant cookie from work cafeteria lady. The register lady under-charged me somehow even though I told her about it. Total was 5$. Well played cookie, I love you. <3 <3 I LOVE COOKIE!

Not really my idea of scary

Link from i09. ‘It Follows’ is literally a creature that follows you and when it catches you it kill and humps you at once. So weird. ‘Train to Busan’ is almost comedic though probably better than the others on the list. Are there really any scary movies anymore? Seems they’re funny, really stupid or just a gore…

I ate a bratwurst from the work cafeteria 

Wish me luck. Gut gurgling imminent.

I cannot decide

If I should go spend 1.50 on a cookie or not. Already spent a $5 on lunch... Tis a really good cookie though. Heavenly.

Is there a space shuttle coming in tonight? Is there a space shuttle coming in tonight?

Just saw something come through the atmosphere. It was pretty neat and not an asteroid. Had a type of halo behind it. After googling looks like it was caused by a heat shield from the craft. Not aliens. San Diego, Ca.

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