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Georgia, Georgia, Georgia  Georgia, Georgia, Georgia 

Gimme a B! Gimme an A! Gimme a [barfs in bag].

Jeff Sessions Was Forced Out of His Favorite Job Ever Jeff Sessions Was Forced Out of His Favorite Job Ever

A very petite barf for you all today, since we covered a lot of shit in the last 24 hours.

Well, That Went Poorly Well, That Went Poorly

Polls were real bad today, apparently.

5 More Days  5 More Days 

An actual photo of me (on the left) and Jezebel’s Cannibal Witch (on the right) as we count down the days until Election Day. Don’t we look great??

Ted Cruz Confesses  Ted Cruz Confesses 

Happy Halloween! Politics are scary! Boo???

Kellyanne Conway Blames the Pittsburgh Synagogue Shooting on 'Late Night Comedians'  Kellyanne Conway Blames the Pittsburgh Synagogue Shooting on 'Late Night Comedians' 

Did you know barf bag spelled backwards is gab frab? Makes you think!

Trump Says the Proposed Guidelines in That Anti-Trans Memo Would 'Protect the Country' Trump Says the Proposed Guidelines in That Anti-Trans Memo Would 'Protect the Country'

Just had that Troye Sivan song pop into my head but instead of “My My My” it was “Why Why Why.” Felt relevant!

Big Night for Racism and Personal Humiliation in Texas Big Night for Racism and Personal Humiliation in Texas

Donald Trump (barf) is in my home state of Texas tonight to stump for “Beautiful Ted” Cruz (now I’m barfing some more) and apparently Alex Jones (oh my God I’m continuing to barf) is there too.

Trump Compares Saudi Prince to Brett Kavanaugh Because He Has Bad Taste in Men Trump Compares Saudi Prince to Brett Kavanaugh Because He Has Bad Taste in Men

My mom is 100% sure that we live in the End Times, and lately, I have been inclined to agree.

Stephen Miller, Glue Eater, Is at It Again Stephen Miller, Glue Eater, Is at It Again

Will you be watching Melania on Friday night at the ungodly hour of 10 pm ET? I will not, for I will be sleeping after consuming an inappropriate number of CBD gummies.

Mitch McConnell, Go to Your Room Mitch McConnell, Go to Your Room

Well, I did it. I filled the whole bag.

Orrin Hatch to Survivors of Sexual Assault: 'Grow Up' Orrin Hatch to Survivors of Sexual Assault: 'Grow Up'

I drank five cans of Diet Dr. Pepper today and I don’t feel great! How was your day?

Ivanka Reportedly Still Supports Brett Kavanaugh  Ivanka Reportedly Still Supports Brett Kavanaugh 

Let’s dive into some grim news.

One Radiation, Please One Radiation, Please

Can’t talk! Singing Hoku’s “Perfect Day” to a cobweb-covered stool in the corner!

Referendum on the Florida Ballot Could Restore Voting Rights to 1.5 Million People  Referendum on the Florida Ballot Could Restore Voting Rights to 1.5 Million People 

I’m still listening to the Trump press conference. I am TRULY going to barf.

Ivanka Is Not Listening  Ivanka Is Not Listening 

You see this? This is my barf bag. It was my grandmother’s barf bag, and her grandmother’s before that. One day I shall give it to you, my granddaughter, but not today. Not today.

Ivanka in Space Ivanka in Space

We made it. Did we make it? Oh shit. I don’t think we did.

George Bush, Shut Up George Bush, Shut Up

Barf? In my bag? It’s more common than you think…

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